Wrapped
by Steve Mitchell
searching
chipped bricks and crumbling walls,
divination -
these fever dreams, wrapped in sheets,
I wake up and roll over
—-
© Steve Mitchell 2012
searching
chipped bricks and crumbling walls,
divination -
these fever dreams, wrapped in sheets,
I wake up and roll over
—-
© Steve Mitchell 2012
You managed to keep it at bay for awhile. I guess the cold had to have its way with you.
…sending chicken soup thoughts!
f’n bwawk!
Thanks Sweetie.
Nice would consider losing the gerund L1 & starting… I search… substituting the “I” in the final line for then.
Mike
Thanks for reading and thanks for the feedback, Mike.
I agree losing the gerund would make the poem stronger and more forceful, but it would also make the piece more linear than I wanted.
I’ll have to revisit it in a couple of weeks, after I’ve had time to forget what I wrote!
well written, like it!
Thanks, Francina!