Blooper Reel

by Steve Mitchell

*beep*

Some of you may remember when I …umm.  You may remember when, ahhh

cut

Sorry about that; I don’t remember.  Line?


*beep*

future

[BANG]

Whoa!

cut!  It fell again.  Guys!

What happened?

the picture fell over

scared me


*beep*

Here at Schmeednotheave we-

[laughter]

wait…what’d I say?

[more laughter]

Did I say Schmeednotheave?

cut!


*beep*

♫ I get no kick from Champaaagne!  Mere alcohol doesn’t thrill me at all…

[laughter]

Steve, we’re rolling

What?


*beep*

future

It fell again…

guys, can we get some tape or something to hold that thing up?


*beep*

bugpaint

cut! is the door open?  how’d that get in here?  never mind.  use it!  we’ll use it.


*beep*

spring blossom –
the fragrance
like memory

cut!

What’s wrong?

that’s no good; it’s a simile

What?

your haiku is a simile

Wait.  My haiku is a simile?  Is that some sort of metaphor?

no, it’s literally a simile.  we can’t use it.  it’s not traditional

I like it.

it’s not haiku

Okay, whatever.  I’ve got a metaphor for you.

what

Your door is a jar…HA!


*beep*

future

cut!! for crying out loud….

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