I Should’ve Used A Fig Newton 

by Steve Mitchell

As you may have already learned, the theory of gravity is just a theory!

I know, right?

It’s just a theory but we have all these people walking around and saying things like, “Oh, gravity is sooo real.”  And, “Oh, hey, have you heard about how gravity makes stuff fall?”  And, “Again, Steve, I don’t think you understand the gravity of the situation.”

I, for one, am tired of people forcing their gravity-centric worldview on me. As a matter of fact, I’ve heard from sources gravity may not be real at all!

Take this apple. When I let go of this apple, it will surely float straight up into space.  

Why?

Because I’m not fooled by scientists and their trick-us-with-science ways!

Ready?  Watch close. Here goes. 

3, 2, 1 …aaand

.

.

[*thud*]

.

.

Well

You must’ve been watching the experiment upside down…


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